Christmas Devotional

Last Christmas was really difficult for Josh and I as it was our first Christmas without Leyton. My father usually leads our family in a short devotional before we eat dinner but last year Josh and I felt the Lord prompting our hearts to write a little something to our family. If I would have been blogging last year I'm sure I would have posted this (maybe I did and I don't remember), but I wanted to share it with you. Re-reading it brings back so many emotions of where we were a year ago and I can't read it without crying and aching for my sweet Leyton.

Christmas 2009

Devotional

Last Sunday at church, Josh and I both felt the Lord’s leading to write something for Christmas day. This is just something from our heart that we have felt led to share with our family.

Over these past six months since we’ve lost Leyton, we’ve been asking the Lord, “What are you teaching us through this loss?” We were only thinking about what the Lord would teach us, and last Sunday we realized that the Lord wants to use us through this loss for His glory. We changed our prayers, submitted to God’s sovereignty and asked Him, “How can you use us for your glory this Christmas?” In all that we do and especially through Leyton’s life and death, we want to bring glory to God.

What we want most to come from Leyton’s death is for our family and friends to come to know Jesus and have a personal relationship with Him. Resulting in someday having the honor of meeting Leyton in Heaven. We must stress Leyton did not die for our sins, Christ died for our sins. But we believe for our family, Leyton has prepared the way for the Lord to come into our lives to know Christ in a deeper way. It is our hope that through Leyton, others who have not known Christ may know Him. Leyton should not be the reason for us wanting to attain salvation, yet Christ should be, with Leyton acting as a stepping-stone to Christ.

Leyton has the honor of spending his first Christmas with the Lord. And as much as we wish he were here with us, he is not wishing to be here.

It was exactly a year ago when we announced our pregnancy to the whole family. Even a year ago, God knew where we would be today. He knew He would be taking Leyton home with Him. As sad and devastating as this has been for us, we know God is in control. Even six months later, we cannot understand and will never understand why God chose to bring Leyton home even before we could hear his cry or see his eyes open. But we trust that God cares deeply for us. He was in control a year ago, and today He still remains sovereign and in control.

 Jeremiah 29:11-13

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

God’s care and love for us is still great – even unfathomable at times. God is good and there is nothing that can separate us from His love. And we want everyone here to be able to experience the depth of His love for us. Romans 8 has always been one of my favorite chapters in the Bible, these are a few verses that have always given me strength.

Romans 8:28

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

Romans 8: 37-39

….in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

 We also just want to say thank you to our family for the immense care we have received from everyone. We appreciate you all and we praise and give thanks to the Lord for blessing our lives because of you. 

This Christmas was certainly bittersweet for me. It has been more than amazing to have Jonah and celebrate his first Christmas with all of our family, but I have not forgotten Leyton and I miss him. But I am encouraged when I look back and reflect and see what the Lord has been doing in my life. He has been so faithful and I am so thankful for my most favorite Christmas gift. 

 

All is well

I have so much to say about how amazing our sweet Jonah is and how we are doing adjusting to life with a baby, but I'm finding my brain isn't working so well on the very little sleep I've been getting (though totally worth it). So I will leave you all with this sweet picture of Jonah and my mother (his Kika) after one of his sponge baths. We are doing well. I feel like I've recovered well from my c-section (I do get a little sore if I've been moving around too much) and breast feeding is getting much better. Each new day brings new challenges but I am embracing them and loving every minute I get to spend with Jonah. And I really love seeing Josh and Jonah together. My two boys together just melts my heart. 

Feeling incredibly blessed.

Our Sweet Jonah

 

Sweet blessings

We continue to receive so many blessings from our sweet Jonah. 

 I love how having him has drawn Josh and I closer, and just by looking at him we 

see the goodness of the Lord. 

Oh...Josh is an amazing father. 

More posts to come of nursery pictures and of course lots more of Jonah. :)

He's Here!

Jonah Leyton
Born November 22, 2010 at 7:56am
7 pounds 5 ounces & 20" long


We are so in love with this beautiful boy. A precious gift from our Lord.

Hoping to post more pictures soon. Picture taken by my good friend Brooke. Thanks Brooke for capturing these beautiful moments for us.

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Clinging to His Promises

The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.  Deuteronomy 31:8

Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you. Psalm 9:10 

The Lord is my light and my salvation - whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life - of whom shall I be afraid? ... I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.  Psalm 27:1, 13-14

We wait in hope for the Lord; he is our help and our shield. In him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in his holy name. May your unfailing love rest upon us, O Lord, even as we put our hope in you.  Psalm 33:20-22. 

Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him.  Psalm 37:5-7a

Whom have I in heaven but you: And earth has nothing I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.  Psalm 73:25-26

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, "He is my refuge and my fortress, my God in whom I trust."  Psalm 91:1-2

I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us...And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who live him, who have been called according to his purpose...No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.  Romans 8:18,28, 37-39 

But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us...Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen in temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.  II Corinthians 4:7, 16-18

38 Weeks

Well, I'm up because I haven't been sleeping well this week. I fall asleep and wake up half way through the night wide awake with my mind racing. So I figured I'd stay up for a bit to get organized and straighten up my house. 

Anyways, I've made it to 38 weeks! It's pretty wild to think that on Monday (good Lord's willing) we will be meeting this baby. I wanted Josh to take one last picture of me before the big day. I'm off by a couple of days but that's ok. 

Looking back I can remember everything I was feeling a year ago with the holiday season approaching and just over-come with sadness and fear of having to face my first holiday without Leyton. Those feelings certainly aren't gone as I miss my sweet Leyton and new feelings are arising as I think about actually meeting and holding this baby.   

But it is amazing to see how the Lord has brought me to this point at the end of my second pregnancy. As nervous and anxious as I have been throughout these past 38 weeks, I have to thank the Lord for how He has kept me close and has walked with me every single day. He has been faithful in all of his promises and has given me beauty for ashes. He deserves  all of the glory. 

And I can't say thank you enough to all our friends and family who have walked with us through this. We have been so blessed by your love and thank the Lord for each and everyone of you. 

I'm not spoiled but...

I'm not spoiled but 

someone should spank grandma.

I saw this written on a sign this Sunday when Josh's mom and I were at the Country Christmas craft show at the Bayfront Convention Center. It pretty much summed up the two days I spent with my mother-in-law. 

Josh had in interview for residency this past Monday in Toledo so his mother came and stayed with me while he was away. Josh was only gone for one night and I felt bad that she had to drive 6 and half hours just to stay with me, but she really wanted to and I'm so glad she did. We had a great time together and she helped me get some things done around our house.

She didn't come empty handed. Not only did she come up with a frozen lasagna (Josh's fave) and frozen chicken pot pies for us, but she also brought a Radio Flyer wagon full of gifts for the baby! Which is totally wild that she gave us this wagon because just last week Josh and I were talking about getting one for the baby! 

I continue to be blown away by how well his parents love us and bless us. 

Thanks again mom for steam cleaning my carpets, treating me to a pedicure, getting two more sleeper outfits for the baby, and all of the meals. Thanks also for coming with me to my over two hour long OB appointment. I'm so glad you got to experience seeing your grandson during my sonogram, what a great bond you already have with this little baby. Love you and I can't wait to see you and dad this Sunday! 

Pregnant Pics

So I definitely wasn't as good about taking pictures of my pregnant self this time around as last time. I really wanted to do comparison pictures from my first pregnancy and this one but of course when I did manage to take a picture, I couldn't find that same coordinating week. But I did find two to show you though nothing really too special. 

And this was me on Monday but today I'm 37 complete weeks! 

There were times when it seemed like this pregnancy was taking forever but thinking about it now it has flown by, PRAISE THE LORD! Overall, I've felt great. It hasn't been super easy but I'm so thankful for the grace the Lord has given me throughout this pregnancy. Working out definitely helped and not living on Chick Fil A was probably a good thing too. I have been loving food with a little bit of a kick, soooo thankful a Chipotle has opened up here in Erie to help satisfy my Mexican food craving. I've also been craving CARBS, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches (or anything with peanut butter), pumpkin spice lattes, and soft pretzels from the mall...yum! So far I've gained HALF of what I gained when I was pregnant with Leyton, which is crazy I think. We had a sonogram on Monday and they have estimated the baby to be weighing about 6.4 lbs. So this little one might be a bit smaller than his brother, we'll shall see good Lord's willing. 

My Baby Sprinkle

The Lord has blessed me with an amazing group of friends here in Erie. Throughout this past year and a half of loosing Leyton and getting pregnant again, they have walked right along side with me and have been there for me for whatever I have needed. I am so thankful for each one of them.

Last Saturday my girlfriends hosted a baby sprinkle for me (instead of a baby shower). It was wonderful! It was a great time of being with my friends, enjoying delicious Mexican food (probably my main craving this entire pregnancy), celebrating this baby's life, and covering the baby and me in prayer. I asked for no gifts but they gave me a basket full of books (something that I actually needed), and I received a tin box full of notes to me and a note to the baby for the next 12 months. It was perfectly sweet and of course there were tears. Definitely not tears of sadness but truly overwhelmed by my friends love for me. Before I loose it again here are some pictures from the party.

Lindsey, Becky, Kristen, Tanya, Sarah, & me

Starting from the left we have Rashin, Tanya, Sarah, me, & Ashley

 This was one of the games we played. It was a race to see who could eat a jar of baby food the fastest by it being fed to you. Camille and I won but it was totally gross. Sweet potatoes and chicken, yuck! 

And I had sweet potatoes all over me. 

 I love this girl! Not sure what we were doing in this picture. I think we were trying to pose like cheerleaders. 

Brittany came and stayed with me for the whole weekend while Josh was away. I'm so glad she was able to be here with me.  

This isn't everyone who was at the party. I'm sad we didn't get a group shot. 

(Brittany, Brooke, Kristen, prego, Camille, & Sarah)

Thanks again girls for blessing me with an amazing sprinkle! 

not sleeping

I'm not quite sure why I'm not sleeping right now. I woke up at about 2:30am and haven't been able to get back to sleep. I woke up hungry but I often wake up hungry but I can always ignore it. I don't even want to go down the path of eating in the middle of the night because that could get dangerous. And I'm a little uncomfortable because my hips are sore but I don't think that is what was keeping me up. I felt for some reason the Lord wanted me to be up.

Often when I'm not sleeping, I pray in bed for whoever the Lord is laying on my heart or just go down my list of everyone in my family and my friends. But I didn't feel like this is what the Lord was laying on my heart. I started thinking maybe I'm up because Josh has a low blood sugar and I need to check on him, but he wasn't displaying the usual signs he gets when he's low. 


Then I start playing a game I have when I'm not sleeping...I'll give myself until 3am and if I'm not asleep by then I'll get up...3am rolls around I give myself 15 more minutes...and another 15 minutes. This can go on for a long time because I hate getting up in the middle of the night. But at about 3:30am I got a horrible urge to pee so bad I had to get up (this would have been my second trip getting up to use the restroom tonight). So I'm up, I quietly grab my pillow and head downstairs. And I did grab a yogurt because I was really hungry. 


I knew the Lord had something to share with me. I've been reading through John and when I saw where I left off at John 16, I knew this what the Lord was wanting to share with me. At about verse 5 Jesus is telling his disciples that He is going back to the One who sent Him but the Spirit of Truth (the Holy Spirit) is going to be with them. My girls' group and I just started a new Bible study on the Holy Spirit. We are reading The Forgotten God: Reversing Our Tragic Neglect of the Holy Spirit by Francis Chan. We just finished his book Crazy Love and it was amazing and I highly recommend it.) Anyways...I've been trying to pay more attention to the Holy Spirit at work in my life, recognizing the Holy Spirit is always with me.


I kept reading the rest of the chapter but was totally stopped at the second part of verse 20, "You will grieve but your grief will turn to joy." 


Already this week I have seen clear evidence of the Holy Spirit at work in my life. I'm really seeking Him to continue to reveal His truth to me. I believe the Lord brought me to John 16 this morning to reveal something to me, but I don't want to read into anything or take it out of context. Just like I felt the Lord told me (through a friend) when we were going to get pregnant again, in the spring (and we did, we found out on April 2, Good Friday), I wasn't sure at first if that was the Lord or if I was reading into something. So I spent a lot of time in praying and seeking the Lord. And that's kind of where I'm at now with this passage in John 16:20-22. You better believe I'll be covering this too in prayer and seeking the Lord for what He has for me out of this passage. But that in itself is a beautiful thing, as I continue to draw  closer to the Lord I know He is drawing closer to me. 

Journal Entry: 10/21/2010

Disclaimer: this is straight from my journal and some of the sentences may not be complete sentences or make much sense. I just wanted to quickly get what was in my heart out and on to paper. 

___________________________________________________________________________

Thoughts on prayer...I'm struggling with how to pray. I'm asking the Lord for a strong and healthy baby. I'm pleading with him to protect this baby from all harm (in the womb and out). I'm asking the Lord for Josh and I to meet this baby on this side of Heaven. 

I don't know why but deep inside this doesn't feel quite right. 

I know I should be praying, "Lord, I want your will to be in done in my life." And in almost every area of my life I truly desire this. But regarding having this baby, I don't want his will to be done in my life if thata means this baby will die too. Is that horrible? How can I say, "Lord, I trust you with my life." (which I can), but still struggle to say I want his will to be done in my life?

Are my selfish human desires getting in the way of God's best for me? 

And I aslo start thinking of when I'm asking the Lord to protect my baby, I'm reminded that the Lord has fully protected Leyton. He never got to experience any pain or suffering. Wouldn't I want this for all of my children? 

Lord, how do you want me to pray for this baby? 

Lord, I desire for you to be glorified in my life.

___________________________________________________________________________

I recently got to talk with my dear friend Amy via Skype (who happens to live in Italy, so cool right?), I always feel refreshed after she and I talk. Amy is an amazing woman and a wonderful friend. She is always full of wisdom and encouragement for me at exactly the right moments always when I need them. She told me that the Lord wants me to be praying for my baby and encouraged me to do so (Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your request to God. Philippians 4:6).

We also talked a lot about surrendering to the Lord's will for our lives, asking the Lord to help us to  align our will to His. I'm sure I'm not the only one who feels this way but this is so scary for me. I have seen first hand what His will is for my life when that meant that my son was called to Heaven before I was ever able to meet him and look into his precious eyes. But who are we to ever think we know what's best for our lives? I've heard this so many times and I know this (but often need to be reminded of this)...THE LORD KNOWS WHAT IS BEST FOR US. 

I'm still not 100% there yet but I am getting closer with each new day. I'm praying a lot for the Lord to continue to reveal more of Himself to me, praying I continue to feel His peace and grace daily as I am awaiting the arrival of this baby, and praying that what I want for my life is in align with what the Lord wants for me. 

Thanks again Amy for sharing your wisdom with me. I'll be calling again soon for another pep talk. :)

Also....we have a scheduled c-section for Monday November 22. Only two more weeks!

Halloween Pictures

Josh and I had the priveledge of attending our friends Sarah & Drew's third annual Halloween party this past Saturday. We had such a great time and but are sad that it is most likely our last Halloween party with our friends here. Sarah and Drew always throw a great party and have fun games for us all to play. This year they organized a Minute To Win It party, guys vs. girls. It was such a great idea and so much fun even though the guys did win most of the games. Here are some pictures from the party....

 This year Josh and I switched roles...he went as a woman and I was a man with a pot belly. Kind of hard to tell but I also have a bit of a beard (I made with some dark eye shadow).

 Two new friends Duke and Rashin, they went as hippies.

 Adam and Camille with their new son Elliot. Elliot was party animal and Camille was amazing for coming having just had a c-section on Monday. She is a rockstar.

 Freeland and Brooke went as a shot gun wedding and their son River was the ring bearer, so cute! Brooke even had a full on wedding dress with a huge train, such a beautiful bride.

 Kristen and Dan were robbers.

 Our hosts Sarah as a bear and Drew as Guy Fieri.

A little unreal how much he looked like Guy Fieri.

 Lindsay and Ryan were a pair of hooters.

Bill, Christie and their son Jackson had the cutest costumes! Bill and Christie even made their monster heads themselves to match Jackson's costume. Christie is super creative.

Kind of strange but Josh and Freeland looked like they came together as a couple.

Thanks again Sarah and Drew for another great party!

On the Waters of Sorrow

For my birthday my mother got me a book titled COME AWAY My Beloved by Frances J. Roberts. It is a sweet book of short devotionals that are really encouraging and a reminder to experience the Lord's all-sufficient care and provision. As I have been reading something new every morning, I desire to share it with you. Here is one I read yesterday (the bold words are my added emphasis)...

On the Waters of Sorrow

But as it is written: "Eye has not seen, nor ear heard, nor have entered in the heart of man the things which God has prepared for those who love Him." I Corinthians 2:9

O My child, I am coming to you walking on the waters of the sorrows of your life; 

yes, above the sounds of the storm you shall hear my voice call your name.

You are never alone, for I am at your right hand. Never despair, for I am watching 

over and caring for you. Be not anxious. What seems to you to be at present a 

difficult situation is all part of My planning, and I am working out the details of 

circumstances so that I may bless you and reveal Myself to you in a new way.

As I have opened your eyes to see, so shall I open your ears to hear,

and you shall come to know Me even as Moses did, yes, in a face-to-face relationship. 

For I will remove the veil that separates Me from you, and you will know 

Me as your dearest friend and as your truest Comforter.

No darkness will hide the shining of My face, for I shall be to you as a bright star 

in the night sky. Never let your faith waver. Reach out your hand, 

and you shall touch the hem of My garment.

These past four weeks have flown by! I can’t believe our time in Dayton is coming to an end this Saturday. It seems like we just got here. I’m actually kind of thankful for this. I certainly LOVE being here with my family and visiting friends and I’m trying to not wish this time away, but this just means we are even closer to having this baby (good Lord’s willing)!

Here’s what’s been going on with us (if you’re interested):

• I’ve been keeping busy by helping my mom plan a fundraiser for a local non-profit where she volunteers (The Life Enrichment Center).
• Josh has had long hours with this surgery rotation and I’m looking forward to him being on internal med next which should hopefully be better hours.
• Josh had his first residency interview in Grand Rapids at Devos Children’s Hospital, he thinks it went really well. He loved the program and all of the people he met there. He still has quite a few interviews to go to, so we are praying hard for the Lord to continue His good works in Josh and trusting Him placing us in the right residency program. As scary as the unknown is we are excited for this time in our med-school chapter.
• As far as my pregnancy goes, I’ve been feeling pretty good. My hips of course are sore and I’ve been pretty tired because sleep has been an issue but physically I’ve been feeling pretty good, I’m very thankful for this. You know, I love being pregnant but I feel like I’ve already put my time in for being pregnant.
• In terms of how I’m feeling emotionally, that just depends on the day you ask me. Today…not to good. I was listening to a song (Matt Kearney’s song “Closer to Love” I guess we’re all one phone call from our knees). Every time I hear this line it reminds me of how Josh had to call both of our parents to tell them we lost Leyton. I hate that he had to do that. I don’t know why it really hit me this afternoon but it did. I really should have a separate post about the emotions and feelings that seem to be surfacing but that would mean I would have to really confront them and I don’t know if I want to go there.
• Tomorrow my grandmother is hosting a luncheon for me with some of my great aunts and cousins, and when my grandmother does something, she goes all out. I’m really looking forward the luncheon, it should be a really nice time.

I think that’s about all that is new with us Glupkers. I know I’ve been saying this, but I will post about the feelings that are re-surfacing. Everything is jumbled and unorganized in my head at the moment. Once I get things in writing I know it will help me process. Thanks for listening.

27th Birthday Recap

First, I want to thank everyone who was thinking of me yesterday on my 27th birthday (ahhh! I still can't believe I'm 27!). I really appreciate all of the calls, texts, fb messages, etc. I feel so blessed and loved by everyone's thoughtfulness. Sorry if I wasn't able to answer your calls, I will certainly do my best to call you back this week.

This year my birthday was not on my radar. I love making a big deal out of birthdays but this year all I can really think about is this baby and that we only have about 6 weeks left until we can meet him good Lord's willing.

I ended up having a really nice day with the majority of it I spent by myself, but I actually really liked that. My morning was pretty chill. Josh had flowers delivered to my parent's house for me but the note said, "Love you Mommy! Love, Leyton and baby". I'm pretty sure I cried for a good 20 minutes. My husband never ceases to amaze me with his thoughtfulness and love. This also reminded me that I hadn't yet been up to visit Leyton's grave site. I went up to visit him and right when I got there I got a bug bite on my arm and right between my eyes. So I wasn't there for too long but Josh and I are going to go back and bring Leyton a pumpkin.

Embarrassed by my bug bite, I was a little delayed in my Starbucks, Sephora, and shopping plans. But after about 45 minutes the swelling went down and with encouragement from my Aunt Toni, I went shopping. But when I got there I realized I hadn't eaten anything for lunch and I was hungry. I didn't really want to eat my emergency healthy nut mix that I always keep on hand and I didn't want to go anywhere and eat by myself, so I figured since I skipped getting my pumpkin spice latte I could quick run into Cheryl & Co. and grab a cookie...or two. I figured that's an ok birthday lunch.

After shopping (which by they way I have officially begun Christmas shopping, already found a gift for my niece Kate) I was able to grab a quick nap before dinner at PF Changes. After an amazing dinner Josh, my brother, his girlfriend Shelly, and I headed back to my parent's house to carve pumpkins. Marc carved Nola into his pumpkin and Shelly carved her dog Tibby. They turned out pretty cute. Shelly has better pictures of the finished products lit up outside but here are a couple...

 Josh and I shared a pumpkin. Nothing too creative but I really like how the 

monogrammed G turned out.

Josh and Marc knew when the automatic timer was going off but they 

elected to have their faces look like that.

Thanks again to everyone who helped make my birthday incredibly special. I'm looking forward to learning more about the Lord this year, continuing to trust in His promises, and seeing what He has in store for me.

Oh, and happy birthday to everyone who celebrated their birthday this week. I hear this is a pretty popular week for birthdays because if you go back nine months you hit New Year's.   =)

my flesh fails

Josh didn't have to be at work this morning until 6am (as opposed to 4:30 or 5am) but after he left I just couldn't get back to sleep. I have so many things flying through my crazy head that just for one day I'd like to turn my brain off and enjoy what I have right before me and not be thinking and trying to plan my life out until Josh graduates in May of 2011.

And of course the Holy Spirit reminds me of... "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord...(Jeremiah 29:11)

I know through many of my life's experiences (some not so hard and some almost unbearable) that plans change. So why am I going through all of this trouble of trying to plan my life when I clearly know plans change?

Because I'm human. Because I'm a worrier, I like to have a plan, and I like to be in control (can't you hear the Janet Jackson song "Control" in the background?).


Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life...But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all of these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow...(Matthew 6:25, 33-34)

I've read these verses hundreds of times. I've encouraged others with these verses. But yet my flesh fails, again. This is a daily battle. Every morning I wake up I must give the Lord everything I am trying to carry on my own.

Isn't it wonderful that He asks us to give Him our burdens and He wants to carry them for us?

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. (Matthew 11:28-30)

I'm still praying through a lot of different emotions and feelings I'm having as my pregnancy is progressing. I want to share what the Lord has been teaching me and I will soon. Thankful the Lord cares so much for my heart and thankful for the many people who have been praying for Josh, me, and our baby. I feel like I haven't expressed how much I appreciate those prayers, so please know how truly thankful and blessed I am by them. Thankful to be a part of the body of Christ.


I know this is kind of just ramblings this morning but my brain is a little foggy from waking up just shortly after 5am. Hopefully I'll be able to take a little nap today.

Happy Monday!

away rotation

Sorry for the lack of posting this past week, things were just a little crazy while we packed and prepared our townhouse to leave for four weeks. Josh is on a surgery rotation down here in Dayton and we are staying with my parents for the next four weeks. Always good to be home to spend time with family, see friends, and spend lots of time snuggling with sweet Nola. 

So far I've been able to rest a lot which has been wonderful because I've been finding that my energy level has been dwindling. I also think my I've been a little sluggish because Josh is going to have very long hours this month and I have been spoiled for the past eight weeks of getting to spend lots of time with him, it's only been two days and I already miss him. I'm also starting to have a lot of different  emotions and feelings that I'm really struggling to process and they're beginning to weigh heavily on my heart. Right now I'm just asking for the Lord to continue to give my heart peace and to show me more of Himself. He is faithful.

lazy sunday

I woke up this morning thinking that after church I was going to take advantage of today and be super productive. Well, I gave in and took a nap today (Sunday afternoon naps are just too enticing) and my productivity that I was planning on hasn't quite happened (yet).

My to do list that I'm currently putting off, I believe they call that procrastination:

1. cleaning off my desk because I can't even see the bottom of it.

2. posting pictures from our Michigan trip last weekend. 

3. planting some mums I got over a week ago that are still waiting to go into the ground. 

4. winterizing my pot by our front door and the ones on our back patio (we're leaving for Dayton on Friday for a rotation and when we come back at the end of October I'll be 34 weeks pregnant and will really not want to do it then. But there is a huge spider web in the back patio with a huge spider and I'm kind of scared to go out there at the moment.)

5. giving Josh a haircut, he's been asking for one for two weeks now, sorry babe. 

6. finishing all of my nursery project, mostly includes painting. This would require me to first go and get paint and actually have to make a decision on a color, that could take some time. 

7. of course...cleaning our townhouse. 

8. working out.

9. starting a new book, there are just so many books and I don't know what I should choose, any suggestions?

10. getting together my Operation Christmas Child shoe box to bring to my church this week.

11. ordering diapers from Amazon, I have a couple of coupons from my Parents magazine that can get me diapers for super discounted prices. I have until the end of the month to redeem. Crazy how fast September has been going by. 

I suppose if I am able to accomplish all of these (which there is no reason I shouldn't) before we leave on Friday then I'll be in pretty good shape. 

My weekend wasn't totally unproductive. Yesterday I went over to my friend Sarah's house for a little sewing get together. I really hadn't sewn anything since sophomore year of high school so she helped me sew fabric onto cloth diapers to use as burp cloths. And I am so happy how they turned out! Thank you so much Sarah for all of your help!

I suppose they weren't terribly difficult to do, I was just so hesitant to start because I'm a perfectionist and was afraid to mess up. Aside from the ones Sarah did, mine are far from perfect. I have a lot of left over scrap pieces that I want to cut out cute shapes like a tie or dog and apply it onto onesies. And for that I will be consulting my other good friend Brooke.